Barney Miller

Season 3

TV-PG

Barney Miller is the kind of cop we'd all like to run into. He is always sensible. He maintains order over a squad room of detectives who gamble for a hobby, get hit on by anything in skirts, go to renaissance philosophy conventions for fun, and would really prefer to be writing. Nearly all of the action takes place in the squad room where the citizens and criminals are brought in to complicate the mix.

Where to Watch Season 3

22 Episodes

Evacuation
E1
EvacuationWojo is dismayed to discover that the city doesn't have up-to-date evacuation procedures in the event of an emergency; Fish meets Jilly Pappalardo, a young thief who he will eventually care for in the ""Barney"" spin-off ""Fish.""
Quarantine (1)
E2
Quarantine (1)Wojo brings in a sick perp who collapses on the floor...resulting in the 12th being put under quarantine,with the following personnel present:A lady of the evening [who gets friendly with Fish!], Marty and Mr Driscoll, and of course, Inspector Lugar....
Quarantine (2)
E3
Quarantine (2)The quarantined 12th Precinct tries to make it through the night: Lugar has a 'talk' with Marty and Daryl Driscoll; and Harris has a loud rant in his sleep.
Bus Stop
E4
Bus StopQuarters are tight at the 12th when a holdup man is confined with his busload of victims.
The Election
E5
The ElectionElection Day at the One-Two includes: A woman, being held from voting by her husband, throws a toilet seat into the street to get attention; a shoplifter gets escorted to vote by Wojo, who promptly 'loses' him; and Inspector Lugar comes electioneering for a old time political hack.
Werewolf
E6
WerewolfFlu epidemic is underway so a pretty African American nurse arrives at the police station to give everyone vaccines. However, Wojo is deathly afraid of needles, and Harris tries to hook up with her even though she's not interested. Meanwhile, a man claiming to suffer from werewolf curse is brought in for public disturbance. He asks the officers to lock him up before he turns into a werewolf when full moon rises that evening.
The Recluse
E7
The RecluseA latter-day prophet claims the end is near - 5:30, to be precise; a man who hasn't left his apartment since World War II is brought in for refusing to serve jury duty. John Cassisi appears as Victor Kreutzer, a role he would continue to play on ""Fish.""
Noninvolvement
E8
NoninvolvementWojo brings in a man called Al Mitchell for refusing to help a mugging victim, Mrs. Hanson, but Barney doesn't think that Mitchell's inaction is a crime. Shyster lawyer Arnold Ripner agrees to take Mitchell's case and sue the station. Meanwhile, Det. Maria Battista brings in a flasher, Charles Yusick, who asks his group therapy friend and lawyer Lyle W. Farber, who used to be a flasher, for help.
Power Failure
E9
Power FailureA power failure darkens spirits at the 12th, where they play host to a man with a split personality.
Christmas Story
E10
Christmas StoryWojo wants to tell Yemana that his Christmas Eve date is a call girl; Fish dons a red suit to catch a mugger who's targeting Kris Kringles; Luger fishes for an invitation from Barney for Christmas Day.
Hash
E11
HashWojo brings hashish-laced brownies his new girlfriend made to the 12th Precinct, getting the detective squad stoned; while an actor and critic (""natural enemies"" says Harris) square off with dueling swords.
Smog Alert
E12
Smog AlertAll eyes are on Fish as the city undergoes a first-stage smog alert; an unlikely connection is made between a potential suicide victim and an obscene graffiti artist.
Community Relations
E13
Community RelationsBarney is charged with harassment when he arrests a blind shoplifter. An evicted tenant threatens a landlord with a musket. Harris, who is a smoker, and Yemana, who is a gambler, make a bet that whoever manages to quit his vice longer wins.
The Rand Report
E14
The Rand ReportRather than return one week per month to uniformed patrol, Wojo quits the force.
Fire '77
E15
Fire '77The 12th may go up in smoke, to the delight of a suicidal couple.
Abduction
E16
AbductionA couple wants Barney's assistance with their cult-influenced daughter. Nick's bookie is arrested. Harris gets a short story published in a slick gentleman's magazine. Bernice interviews for a job over Fish's objections.
Sex Surrogate
E17
Sex SurrogateWeary of waiting for promotion, Levitt announces that he's quitting the force; Barney investigates a sex clinic that borders on brothel status; Harris investigates a rash of crimes ostensibly committed by a juvenile.
Moonlighting
E18
MoonlightingBarney discovers that Harris has been moonlighting; Dietrich arrests a priest who's fencing stolen goods; a racketeer is using a retarded boy as an assistant.
Asylum
E19
AsylumMarty is picked up for parole violation with a half ounce of marijuana; Wojo prematurely grants a Russian defector asylum.
Group Home
E20
Group HomeYemana assists a bigoted Army officer when a bomber threatens a recruiting facility; it's Fish's turn for mugging detail as Victor and Jilly resurface with Bernice in tow.
Strike (1)
E21
Strike (1)An impending strike is on everyone's mind, except the woman who was robbed by her computer date. (Part 1 of 2)
Strike (2)
E22
Strike (2)Barney and Inspector Luger man the fort alone when the detectives go out on strike.