300
300
Based on Frank Miller's graphic novel, "300" is very loosely based the 480 B.C. Battle of Thermopylae, where the King of Sparta led his army against the advancing Persians; the battle is said to have inspired all of Greece to band together against the Persians, and helped usher in the world's first democracy.
HaHaHarvey44 reviewedMay 8, 2025
300 is less a movie and more a testosterone-fueled fever dream... like if a history class was taught by a bodybuilder on pre-workout and rage. Zack Snyder delivers two hours of oiled abs, slow-motion murder, and speeches shouted with the subtlety of a Spartan sword to the chest. It’s historically accurate in the same way pro wrestling is an Olympic sport, but who cares?
Gerard Butler growls every line like he’s gargling gravel, and the visuals are drenched in so much CGI and sepia it looks like the entire film was shot inside a protein powder factory. Subtle? No. Profound? God, no. Entertaining? Absolutely, if your brain’s had a few beers first.
It’s dumb, loud, glorious nonsense.