The Substance
The Substance
Have you ever dreamed of a better version of yourself? You. Only better in every way. Seriously. You've got to try this new product. It's called the Substance. It changed my life. It generates another you. A new, younger, more beautiful, more perfect you. And there's only one rule: you share time. One week for you. One week for the new you. Seven days each. A perfect balance. Easy, right? If you respect the balance...what could possibly go wrong?
Kevin Ward reviewedJuly 1, 2025
I loved so much of this—the body horror, truly gruesome practical effects, both Moore and Qualley baring it all. There is so much eye candy, both the grotesque and gorgeous varieties. But at a certain point I really started to feel the 2 hr 20 minute runtime and it really seemed like theme was literally being smashed into our brains with a sledge hammer. We see Dennis Quaid’s caricature of a studio executive utter the phrase “Pretty girls should always smile” in a way that is so hammy that it becomes grating the 3rd or 4th time we see it repeated. I really kind of hate rating this so low because if this was 90 minutes, I’d probably be at 4.5-5 stars. To me it just goes on for too long without really saying anything new.